February 27, 2003

some days suck

file under: my life

i should have known it was gonna be one of those days when news of mr. rogers' death was the first thing to come spilling out of my bedside clock radio.

...

it just went downhill from there, one molehill piled on top of another, until it seemed like leaving work early was a good idea. here's the quick run-down:

• mr. rogers passes away from cancer, erasing any lingering illusions that the nicest people, those who fill the world with good things, are subject to the grim reaper just like the rest of us.
• i almost got broadsided by a bus driving to work (my bad - didn't notice the lack of a stop sign for said motorized coach).
• the guy at the parking garage set off my car alarm when he tried to park the car (still not quite sure how he did that, but...).
• i looked at the web site i'm developing in Netscape 4.77, and witnessed the worst cross-browser catastrophe in all my years as a web developer. this led to the immediate realization that i might have to rewrite all of the code i've so meticulously developed over the past three weeks, which in turn led to a brisk walk around the block, followed by several hours of teeth-gnashing.
• i had no other work to do while stewing over the aforementioned browser catastrophe.
• in the downtime, i tried to teach one of my co-developers about JavaScript basics, and failed miserably, which made both of us feel pretty foul.

i should note that all of the office-related events occurred in a malodorous atmosphere smelling of dog urine and industrial-strength floor cleaner. (the office dog, while terribly endearing, is not yet housebroken, and the best efforts of the cleaning man aside, the smells were strong enough to make your eyes water).

by the end of the workday, the browser catastrophe had been downgraded from a red alert to a mere yellow concern, but this was a pyrrhic victory...the day had already been stained, and the best one could do was leave the office quietly, tail firmly ensconced between legs, and hope for a better day tomorrow.

Posted: 02.27.03 at 5:58 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

February 12, 2003

sort-of-new science

file under: technology

tonight i went to see stephen wolfram speak at the san francisco city arts and lectures series. i went not out of rabid fandom, but rather because i wanted to assess whether or not this guy is a crackpot.

for those unfamiliar with dr. wolfram, he is best known as the creator of mathematica, a highly regarded piece of mathematical software, used primarily by scientists. he is also a theoretical physicist of some repute who has garnered recent attention by writing a book with the presumptuous title a new kind of science.

you can see why one might be dubious about the mental faculties of someone who claims to have created a new kind of science.

so, crackpot or genius?

...

caveat emptor: the following scientific rant will not be of general interest and may make me seem like your typical scientific pedant (see, there, i'm doing it already). feel free to continue browsing elsewhere if techno-jargon makes you feel light-headed or otherwise ill or disgusted.

first, let me say that dr. wolfram is not, on the surface of things, a crackpot. he doesn't claim to be the next isaac newton, or that einstein was a bozo. there are plenty of folks out there who fall into this category, and wolfram is not one of them. he is extremely erudite, and seemingly knowledgeable about, well, just about everything...

during the course of the evening, he held forth about mathematics, physics, biology, darwinism, free will, the shape of snowflakes, and the colorful patterns on mollusk sheels. he also managed to get off a few good jokes, something most scientists only dream of (unless they're dreaming about things like quantum gravity and the fundamental beauty of abelian groups, which they usually are).

however, this humble writer believes it a bit bold to say that a "new" kind of science is being proposed by dr. wolfram. a few of his major ideas seem to have come up before:

• computational irreducability: hmmm...haven't read the book, but it seems like godel's incompleteness theorems (ca. 1931) covered a lot of this territory. funny, but someone asked a question about this after the talk...wolfram has clearly thought and written about the connections, so he knows this idea isn't necessarily new.
  
• complexity from simplicity: anyone who has done any computational modeling would tell you that simple models can yield complex results (cf. n-dimensional ising models, chaos theory, to name a few realms of study). nothing new there.
  
• deep insights from cellular automata: i think john von neumann had a pretty good handle on this, or at least a big start, back in the 60s. no doubt wolfram has extended knowledge here greatly, but the fundamental ideas are not new.
  

it appears that dr. wolfram is watering numerous seeds planted by others, which any great scientist will inevitably do. however, to pass the results of one's endeavor off as "new" science smacks of tremendous hubris in my book...maybe i'm just quibbling about semantics, though.

at any rate, he may be on to something. now i just have to set aside a few months to read the nice, terse 1200-page monograph he has written on the subject. donations of coffee and no-doze are welcome.

Posted: 02.12.03 at 10:21 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

February 5, 2003

party angst

file under: thoughts about things

i've had a few parties lately (new year's, birthday, chinese new year), and have noticed a few themes that seem to play out consistently, mostly along the lines of angst...as a result, i've come up with a short list of things i need to keep in mind when throwing parties.

...

rule 1: there will always be a moment, however brief, when you think no one is coming
call me insecure, but it always happens. the internal dialog for me goes something like, "maybe they forgot. maybe that evite didn't go out (see rule 4). did i say 7 or 11? (they rhyme, after all)."

corollary to rule 1: people always show up late, unless you expect them to
two hours late seems to be a pretty good rule of thumb, for my friends at least. if it's a dinner party, 30-45 minutes is more like it...if you're running late, people will almost always wind up waiting for you and then give you grief for showing up late to your own damn party.

rule 2: you will always buy too much food
whatever you buy, make sure it's something you're going to enjoy eating for a few days, because that's exactly what's going to happen.

rule 3: you will usually buy too much booze
i remember the college days, when it seemed there wasn't enough alcohol in the world to satisfy the unquenchable thirst of my guests. those days are gone. worried about that well-stocked bar? i'd venture that almost any party can get away with beer, wine, vodka, and coke (and maybe a mixer, lemons, and limes). forget about kamikazes for jane or wine coolers for your friend ralph. they can make do...

rule 4: technology is great, but it's no substitute for a phone call
thanks to the wonders of modern technology (i.e., evite), you can now avoid making those irritating phone calls and confronting people about a social event! just send an evite!!! bzzzzt. despite implicit promises to the contrary, there is simply no substitute for talking with someone, and even then, there's no guarantee that they will come, even if they say they wouldn't miss it for the world (see rule 6)...

rule 5: you will always, always, forget to invite someone
maybe i'm just absent-minded. i don't have that many friends. and yet, every time i have an event, i always forget someone and feel guilty about it for weeks. people are usually pretty understanding about this...

rule 6: shit happens
this can be applied to just about any circumstance that doesn't go your way. your best friend doesn't show up to your party? hey, it's ok! shit happens. it's really, really, true. when experiencing feelings such as those found in rule 1, one should always remember rule 6.

got any rules to add? let me know...

Posted: 02.05.03 at 9:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

neotropic

file under: music

dj shows are a mixed bag, at best, but when i saw that one of my favorite ninja tune acts, neotropic, was playing at club six, i decided to brave uncertainty and go hear the mix...

the good news? i got to meet riz maslen, enigmatic front woman of the "band". the bad news?

...

the electronic flyers for the show indicated that the club opened its doors at 10pm. there was to be one opening act, a band whose name escapes me (most opening acts seem to suffer from this problem, whether or not they deserve it). as fate would have it, elaine had to work early the next day, so i braved the show alone - club six is usually a great time, what's the worst that could happen?

when a club doesn't specify the starting time for a dj show, one is guaranteed two things:

• if you go early, the show will start late
  
• if you go late, the show will be over by the time you get there
  

(bzzzt...wrong answer!)

there were no beats. club six closed off the bottom floor of the club to let the dj's prepare. the top floor, meanwhile, was occupied by a private birthday party, sans dance floor and the music that goes with it.

i sat in the corner, people-watching as best i could, until about 12:30am, when they opened the bottom floor. once they did, again, the beats were absent, and the anxious "crowd" had to wait until the opening act, who came on at about 12:45am and played a slightly unremarkable set that lasted about an hour...

after the show, people milled about, waiting for the headliner. the club was about a third full, if that...not a good turnout to say the least. when neotropic finally came on at about 1:45am, the people who were there were clearly ready for a show.

the first song came up to scattered cheers, and then dissipated into a mix of 'massive attack' after about one minute...technical problems. riz had come without her band, and was hence using an apple powerbook as a stand-in...

after about 10 minutes, she started playing again, but the technology gods were aligned against her. the entire set was a wash...nothing sounded as it should have, she kept fighting her equipment, and the crowd dwindled and dwindled, finally losing interest and leaving before she was done. by the last song, there were four or five staunch fans swaying unconvincingly on the dance floor, trying to provide encouragement...the show ended with a whimper, as she fought and lost to her powerbook. when she was done, all she could do was hang her head and bang it against the keyboard.

it's not the worst show i've ever seen, but given that neotropic is one of my favorite acts, it might as well have been.

the bright spot? while waiting for the show upstairs, a woman with spiky dyed hair came up next to me at the bar. sure enough...riz maslen.

(sheepishly) excuse me...are you playing tonight? are you riz maslen?

why yes, i am...

oh...i LOVE your music! i've been a fan ever since you were born! i followed you through the english public school system, seeing your potential all the time, waiting for that day when you would break free of the oppressive tyranny of blah blah blah blah blah...you're a genius!

(genuine smile) thank you!

yes, i played the sickeningly adoring fan, just for a moment. it was ugly, but at least it made up for everything else...she was very nice, and clearly appreciated the support.

so, my advice to those of you who go to see dj shows - leave your expectations in the cellar, go early, stay late, and remember - it's all about being a fan.

Posted: 02.05.03 at 9:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

we really, really mean it

file under: thoughts about things

based on the presentation of secretary powell today, it seems there is only one thing that can avert a disastrous war - iraq must, within the next week or two, produce all of the weapons we "know" it has.

weapons inspectors will not find the needle in the iraqi haystack unless iraq cooperates. their apparent policy of systematic deception comes as no surprise, and unless some bizarre planetary alignment occurs and allah or whomever else wills it, i have little doubt they will continue to prevaricate. this leads to a clear scenario:

1.  inspectors go to iraq and find little or nothing new, even if they have triple the number of inspectors and U2s and reports from joe-i'm-on-the-inside intelligence officer and anything else we can dig up to throw at the problem
   
2.  iraq continues to claim that everything we are saying is the opposite of truth, and denounces the world community for following in american military footsteps
   
3.  inspectors return and deliver a report to the UN security council that is ambiguous and inconclusive, modulo possible additional support for the fact that iraq is not cooperating
   
4.  faced with the grim dilemma of we-say-they-say, the US of course stands firm with "we say", and lays down the final gauntlet - war
   
5.  the UN security council does who-knows-what, and war happens anyway
   

maybe i'm being too pessimistic. i hope this is not the scenario that plays out, but i fear it will be...i pray that i am wrong wrong wrong.

if war is the result of this process, the best possible outcome is that we, as a world community, can avoid having to ever go through this madness, and what madness may come soon, again. given human history, i doubt we can even achieve that...we seem bent on destroying each other.

Posted: 02.05.03 at 7:25 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)